Well, it is I again the owner of another blog spot that will probably not get any other pair of eyes to glance upon its depressing musings. My life as it is at age 40 is sucking. And when I say it is sucking it is sucking a BIG ONE!

Where should I start. First of all, I get laid off from my job at a leading retailer earlier this month. I won't say whom but we all know who this giant of retail is. Then in a panic I decide I am going to put my house of for sale. Guess what, my house is shit. For real. I've tried my best with this place but I can't handle it. I've let the driveway get all cracked up, I need new windows, gutters and siding, and the foundation is a monster ready to raise it's head at any moment. There are stress fractures in several rooms but it is holding it's on right now. To top this all off, the foundation company that did the work with the previous owners won't give me the warranty the previous owners neglected to transfer when I bought the house. This is all my fault big time. My realtor didn't know, the realtor working with the relocation company claimed he didn't know and I got screwed!! Now, these blood suckers won't let the warranty be passed on to me. I tried half-heartedly to get it 3 months after the purchase 3 yrs ago but was turned down then but I didn't push back. Now I'm sucking that big dick and it is gagging me like nobody's business.

Yeah, I'm doing some major whining but who cares. I feel like I'm hanging on my last leg here. I have no job and it doesn't seem like I will be getting a call from anyone but it has only been two weeks so the scary music hasn't started to get too loud but I can hear it lurking in the back ground. I'm pondering what to do. I'm having conversations with GOD and i know he has turned a deaf ear to me. Maybe, maybe not. I don't know. All I know is I feel fucked over and I don't know what to do.

I joked earlier on facebook that I am getting my butt groove in place ala Homer Simpson and I'm doing a damn fine job of it. I had a major hissy fit, cried an ugly cry, almost choked on my on snot and asked GOD to finish me off. Either he ain't listening or he has something else in store for me. What I don't know. I'm trying to see if I should do the simple things floating around in my mind or wait to see what will happen. I'm going to wait for a little while but I can't wait too long.

Why you may ask? I have a kid to provide for. Yes, I have a kid that is probably going to suffer for my horrible decision making skills. You know, all this stuff I have, I asked for it! Damn, the sentiment that you should beware what you asked for is so totally true!!

I've been applying for jobs through job sites. I've done my bit of networking by emailing 4 people about ideas for a job. Yeah, I said 4. I'm only one speaking terms with 4 people in the god forsaken state (texas) and the ideas they gave me washed out like the dirt in my backyard. I have been looking through a women's magazine to get some ideas on making money and they are all falling short. This blog will probably get me know where also. Who wants to read about somebody else's misery and be depressed by the shit their lives are turning into. I guess you are thinking enough already, I know stuff is hard right now but at least your're not involved in some natural disaster. I know, thank god.

I'm out.